Tag: struggles

Milestones

Haters Step Off!

sweetbabymeg

I have done some amazing things on this journey. Well, things I feel are amazing.  I have been at this now since March and I feel great.  I have gotten wonderful compliments and feedback from so many people.  But as soon as I said I was doing a 5K, things changed.  People in my gym have been nothing but extremely supportive, but people outside of the gym, and even some family have not been.  The other day was the last straw, so I took to the Less Thighs More Thunder Facebook Page and posted a little rant.  For those who are not on Facebook, here is what I wrote :

” I am pumped and terrified about my first 5k. But let me say this – I am adult, I know my body and I, above anyone else know what I can do. So what on Gods green earth makes people think I am NOT ready for this?!?! Yes, I am over weight, yes, I am a slow runner, yes, its gonna take me a while, but so help me, if I hear one more time… ” You sure you can do this? You sure you want to do this? Are you really sure?” I am gonna drop kick someone! Ugh! Have faith people! I HAVE GOT THIS!!! ….. i feel better now”

It was driving me nuts – to keep having people ask me if I am ready, if I think I can do it. I didn’t understand why all of of sudden people were thinking I Couldn’t do it.   I was just really bothered by it. The last comment I got was from my grandfather, now , granted he is almost 90 years old but after it infuriated me, it made me think.  I started talking about it with my oldest and his response when I asked him about it was ” Aren’t you jumping the gun just a bit?” I asked him why he said that.  He said, “shouldn’t you do a 3k first? ” I explained that I have already run farther than 3k.  He said ” Oh”.  Then it dawned on me, these people have no idea what I have done or what I am capable of.  The folks in class, they see me, they are are also doing it themselves, everyone else, just has to take my word for it, that I can do it.  I guess my 33 lbs weight loss isn’t convincing enough.

So, my 5K is a week from today. I know I can do a 5k. I know I can , but I have yet to run that far. So, yesterday, one of my friends from the gym and I set out to run Lake Quannapowitt in Wakefield  My goal was to do at least 2 1/2 miles. It was rough for me, but running with someone, definitely helps someone like me.  My friend Christel was an awesome running partner.   By the time we were done, I had run my own 5k! I just kept going and in the end, I freaking did it!

I gotta admit, I  was so overcome that I actually did it, I cried.

I squished the haters! I was victorious!

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 I am going to finish my race next week, I am not going to let anyone hold me down.  I got this!

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Milestones

Another goal down!

sweetbabymeg

Thats right peeps, I am on a freakin’ roll! Last night I tackled HANDSTANDS!!!! Yup, I am on the wall. Before we started our WOD last night, we had handstand practice.  I had been wanting to try them and this was the perfect opportunity.  I set up my pad and froze.  Completely froze.  I was terrified. Then the realization set in, what the heck is the matter with me? Its a handstand.  I did them all throughout my childhood. What is so different now? Oh yeah, that extra hundred or so pounds I carry around now… But then I took myself back to my childhood.  I used to do flips and handstands and cartwheels and somersaults all the time. We used to have a ” circus” for the whole neighborhood.  Us gals used to dress up in our dance recital costumes and flip over the swing set.  So what if I am not 11 anymore, why can’t I do this? What makes now so different?  Then I started thinking more, when we were kids, we used to watch gymnastics with my mom, like, all the time.  The gymnasts would raise their hands, salute the judges and go.  So, I raised my hands and sunk to the floor, my legs kicked up , but not enough to even get close to the wall.   Think – what else did you use to do?  Yes! The hop .  I put my hands up, did a slight hop and sent my self soaring up against the wall!!!!  Came right back down, but I touched the wall. The secret is the hop 😉

Handstands – Check!!!

I kept on hopping and kept on hitting the wall. Of course I crashed on my head at least once, but I got right back up.  By the end of the practice session , I was holding my handstand on the wall.  I was so excited.  Another goal , crushed!

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Love This!

So, yes, another goal crushed and I have been doing so good lately – I am terrified.  I am scared, will it end? Am I  going to land on my face in general ? Am I going to freak out and fail myself? This is down right scary territory for me.  I am just being honest here, its my blog, so I can, lol. 

I am officially registered for my 5k – my next obstacle .  I am so excited ! I am so freaked out! I am terrified! ARRRGGGHHHH! So many emotions with this – but what I know FOR CERTAIN  :

I WILL COMPLETE THIS RUN!

IT MAY TAKE ME FOREVER, BUT MY CHUBBY FEET WILL CROSS THAT FINISH LINE!

I WILL NOT GIVE UP!

I WILL KEEP SWIMMING!

You can count on that my friends.  Follow me on the journey , hope I don;t let you down. 

And don’t forget you can find me on Facebook too!

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Daily Rants and Raves, Milestones

This is a big deal !

sweetbabymeg

I have had a lot of personal triumphs lately . Pull-ups , ring dips , double unders, personal goals in class smashed …. I am feeling awesome !
So my friends , the next goal I am tackling is : A 5 K !!! Honestly I think I am ready . I haven’t yet run 3 miles but I did 2 today with no issues in about a half hour . I will be slow but I think I can finish in under an hour , I would be happy with that . I have got amazing support , I think I got this !

Today I set out to do 2 miles , my longest run with out stopping was 1.35 miles . I figured I could do this 2 mile goal. And honestly I was shocked that I could do it and it only took me a half hour . I swear it’s “Just Keep Swimming ” that gets me through this . I mean , I listen to my music but I keep saying it over and over in my head . Hey , if it works , who cares right ? Lol.

At the end of the day today , I am happy . I am making so much progress in this journey and getting stronger everyday .
I know if I keep swimming , I will get there .

Just keep swimming folks and we will get there
– Meg

Daily Rants and Raves

Down with the sickness

sweetbabymeg

Ugh. I am sick, I HATE, no, I LOATHE being sick.  I felt it coming on Friday night, I could feel it in my throat, took some NyQuil and prayed.  To no avail, woke up worse Saturday. I still got my class in, but went home, showered and was in bed the rest of the weekend.  I am still all stuffed up.  I can’t stand it!

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I am so frustrated! I am not supposed to be sick!   I met with my coach  to go over my nutrition, I have  a new plan I need to stick to and I feel like crap, I don’t want to eat much, but I need to eat.  It always seems to happen like this…. I get going on something, then boom! something happens and I am tossed off the path.  I CANNOT FALL OFF THE WAGON! I know that this is just a tiny bump, but it just drives me nuts.  I am praying that the NyQuil will work tonight and I will wake up so much better tomorrow.

What do you do when you are sick and need to stay on track? How do you do it?  ARRGG!!!!

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Daily Rants and Raves

You gotta make the time to Commit to You!

sweetbabymeg

Last week was very busy for me, and this week proves to be just as busy – culminating at the end with the wedding of my good friends, Andrea and Lowell. So, knowing I will be stuffing my face with all sorts of goodies and most likely being drunk as a skunk, I damn well better make sure I get my workouts in.

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No matter how busy we are, we always have enough time to make excuses.  I should know because I always had an excuse about why I could not work out or why I could not do something. I was famous for not having the right things lined up.  I felt I needed to have things a certain way to best optimize my process.  And when things would go wrong, it would totally knock me off my game. It would set me back and I could not move on.  What a load of crap!  UGH!

Why was I like that?  Why are any of us like that?  I can’t be the only one that struggles or else you wouldn’t be here reading this, lol.

Why is it so easy  to put things off that will actually help us?  And not just for us, but out loved ones?

For me, my weight just kept going up and going up and going up.  I would bitch and moan and kinda do something, but really half assed. I would not put in the work to change what I was bitching about.  I know I drove my husband nuts, cause I would bitch and he would say ” so do something about it”.  And I never really would.

When my weight hit the highest it had ever been, I knew I had to do something.  When all my clothes were so much tighter and I was getting 3x clothes, I knew I had to do something.  I knew I had to do something DIFFERENT.  I was telling myself I had to do something, falling into the same routine and then it happened.  My friend starting telling me about these classes she was taking.  I am thankful everyday that my friend Jamie introduced me to Befit, where I workout and my amazing coaches.  It was the right program for me at the right time.

For each of us, we need to find what works for us.  Christ, it took my 14 years to find what works for me and something I can dive into and something I can progress at.

But honestly, if YOU cannot commit to YOU, why should anyone else?  It has taken me such a long time to understand and really realize this.

Its my hope that along this journey, someone else may take those baby steps sooner than they would have to better themselves.

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So yes, busy week, but you know I am hitting the gym! Worked out last night, tomorrow and Thursday, and even Saturday before the wedding.

NO EXCUSES! NO BULLSHIT!

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Daily Rants and Raves

Progression, Yes!

sweetbabymeg

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This was was particularly frustrating for me.  Its a mental thing, but I HATE, no LOATHE, not finishing my workouts.  Let me explain – every work out is set to your ability and there is no requirement to complete it, but its a goal, threshold, something to strive for.  It is something I strive for and its a goal each workout.  I must also add, that I am totally comfortable being the last one to finish said work outs. I am okay with that, as long as I finish.

But this week – UGH!  Kicked my ass!   Tuesday night we were supposed to do 6 rounds – I could only do 5.  Wednesday night we were supposed to do 4 rounds, could only do 3.  Thursday night goal was 15 and I did 11.    I was seriously upset over this.  One night, ok, whatever, but 3 in a row? UGH!

Then I chatted with my coaches and looked at it a different way –

 

Tuesday – we ran 200m sprints, Running has long been my nemesis.  It is always a struggle, but this time, I seemed to not have to stop as much as usual. So = Progress.

Wednesday – Turkish getups – It took me forever, but I did them with a weight – FOR THE 1ST TIME! A whole 7.5 lb weight! I know, I know – whoa nelly! Right?! So again = Progress

Thursday – quick and intense short rounds of Ring rows, hands release pushups and body weight squats.  I was able to do ring rows much better I felt than I have in the past, usually after 3 I am dying, but this time I had an easier go of it.  The push ups seem to come easier to me too. So yes , again = Progress!

Today– Tabata, which always kicks my ass, plus it was like 90 degrees, so after the warm up, I was sweating like a pig.  I felt for the most part, each move I was able to do better than I have done before.  Planks are still a dirty bitch, but I ended with box jumps, which are my favorite.  So you got it! = Progress!

 

The moral of my story kids – is its not about Quantity, but Quality! You can do 1000 push ups, but if your form is wrong, you are only doing harm to yourself.  So yes, I was bummin’ about this my incomplete work outs, but I did things I have never done before.  I can see the Progress – I feel the Progress!

You know what I am gonna say next –

 

Gotta keep swimming ! WE can do this!  WE will get there! Thanks for joining the journey!

Feel free to share  your triumphs and tribulations with us!

 

Meg 🙂

 

Daily Rants and Raves

Pull – ups – My Phantom Menace

sweetbabymeg

I have a new nemesis – Pull Ups. I can’t friggen do them.  I can barely do ring rows instead.  I need to get my upper body strength better.  I have so much weight to ” pull up”  So – we have a new goal.

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My modification for the pull ups is ring rows.  Ring rows for those who are unaware, is when you have your hands in rings, then lean back and move your feet in , then pull your self up .  See the pic below.

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This particular exercise is terrifying for me as the reigning Mayor of Fatty McButterpants City.   I have to hold myself up on these little nylon straps and pray they hold as I struggle to pull my self up.  I feel as if the whole rig is gonna topple over on me.  I know it won’t , I think it is bolted to the floor, but when you are using your own weight and you have a lot of it, any thing is possible, especially things snapping and breaking.  You know what I mean, that wobbly chair, you look at it and it crumbles to pieces.  You sit your ass in the car and the whole side goes wayyyyyy down.  Forget about sitting in those little kid chairs at Parent Teacher Conferences, HA! Its easy when you have a big butt to break things with it.

The sad thing is, as someone who is larger, this is what I think about.  I can’t wait until I don;t have to think about it. I am well on my way.

If  I looked at this like I was defeated, Sweet Baby Jesus, where would that leave me?  I WILL do it, maybe not soon, but I will.

 

SO yeah, Star Wars reference, the fam loves Star Wars, especially my oldest.    I thought it was a good way to tie them in 🙂

 

Gotta keep up the swim folks!!! We will get there!

 

Meg 🙂