Daily Rants and Raves

Frustrated in Undiagnosed Land

 

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I had a good run.  From February to September has been the longest time I since I got sick that I have been relatively  flare free. A few small little flares , but otherwise, its been good.  The past month or so , I have noticed the flare getting worse.  It hasn’t subsided.

Arm pits sore, necklace of pain in full effect. Whole Body soreness.  I know I have said it before, I am so fucking over this.

I have an appointment with my Rhumy  coming up, I am not even sure what he can do at this point. But I am going to try and be positive.  I am hoping maybe something will explain why the sudden flare.

Its very hard to be positive. I am trying, I swear, its just so damn hard.  No one understands , because no one knows what the fuck this is.  Like, if you have a disease, chances are there are other  patients who you can relate to and who understand what you are going through.  With Meganitis, I ain’t got shit.

While I am thankful that this is not something that has killed me and I am thankful it is not worse than it is, it truly is awful.  I have resigned myself to the fact that this is something I will never be able to give a proper name and that I will have to deal with the rest of my life.  I just wish the treatment was working.

It’s a terrifying thought that I will potentially be in pain for the rest of my life.  On the Brightside, I guess I can say that I now have a high tolerance for pain.

I am sorry for throwing the pity party.  Some days this really just gets to me and the constant pain I have been in today is exhausting.

Thank you to all of you for coming on the swim with me.  The ups and downs , its nice to have some company on the ride.

thXW3ORQP0

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